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Grandparents do not have an automatic legal right to see their grandchildren in England and Wales. However, they can ask the Family Court to make a child arrangements order for contact, usually after obtaining permission to apply. The court’s decision depends on the child’s welfare, not an adult’s entitlement to visits.
Losing contact can be deeply upsetting, especially if you have regularly cared for your grandchild or been an important source of comfort and support. You may be unsure whether to approach the parents, suggest mediation or speak to a solicitor.
The absence of an automatic right does not mean there are no options. Equally, a close relationship does not guarantee that a court will order contact. Understanding the distinction can help you take practical steps without making promises to your grandchild that you cannot control.
This guide explains the position in England and Wales, where the legal framework and court procedure differ from those in Scotland and Northern Ireland.
Contact may stop after the parents separate, following a disagreement within the wider family or after the death of a parent. Sometimes grandparents become caught in a dispute between their adult child and the child’s other parent.
The difficulty may concern how visits are organised rather than whether the relationship should continue. There might be disagreement about overnight stays, transport, boundaries or conversations about the separation.
Start by identifying the actual concern. A request for shorter visits or neutral handovers calls for a different response from allegations that contact would expose the child to harm.
Try to distinguish what you know from what you suspect. Keeping communication factual gives everyone a better chance of addressing the problem rather than repeating the wider family argument.
No. Being a grandparent does not automatically give you parental responsibility or the same legal position as a parent.
Parental responsibility concerns the legal duties and decision-making powers associated with a child’s upbringing, including important matters such as education and medical treatment. Regular childcare, financial support and a close emotional bond do not, by themselves, give a grandparent that status.
It is also important not to assume that parental responsibility gives any adult an unrestricted right to spend time with a child. Contact arrangements remain a separate issue, particularly where safety or existing court orders are involved.
Some grandparents have parental responsibility through a formal legal arrangement. If you already hold a court order or have been appointed as a guardian, your solicitor should review that before advising on the next step.
Where communication is safe and appropriate, begin with a calm request to discuss arrangements. Explain the relationship you hope to preserve and suggest something specific.
For example, you could propose a short visit at a familiar place, a regular video call or a gradual return to the activities you previously enjoyed together. These are possible starting points, not arrangements the parents must accept.
A useful proposal addresses the child’s routine, transport and any concerns raised. It should also explain how you will keep disagreements between adults away from the child.
Avoid repeated messages, threats of court action or turning up unexpectedly at the family home or school. Do not ask the child to pass messages, keep visits secret or choose between family members.
If direct communication has become hostile, a solicitor can help put forward a measured proposal without immediately starting proceedings. Where there are safety concerns or restrictions on communication, take advice before approaching the other person.
Family mediation can help grandparents and parents discuss arrangements with an independent mediator.
The mediator does not decide who is right or impose a contact schedule. Their role is to help the adults explore whether they can reach an agreement.
Discussions might cover how often visits happen, where handovers take place and whether contact should begin with letters or calls. Mediation can also provide space to address boundaries, such as not discussing the parents’ dispute during visits.
Before making many applications for a section 8 child arrangements order, an applicant will normally need to attend a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting, known as a MIAM, unless an exemption applies.
A MIAM is an initial assessment, not a commitment to attend joint mediation. The mediator considers whether mediation is suitable and explains other options.
Exemptions can include qualifying domestic abuse evidence, child protection concerns and certain urgent circumstances. Not every painful family disagreement meets the legal test for an exemption.
If the parents refuse mediation, that does not automatically prevent a court application. It is important to establish the correct procedural route rather than waiting indefinitely for agreement that may not come.
A child arrangements order under section 8 of the Children Act 1989 can set out who a child spends time with or otherwise has contact with, and when.
For grandparents, this may involve visits, holiday time, telephone calls, video calls or letters. The appropriate arrangement depends on the individual child and the circumstances.
An application seeking contact does not necessarily ask the court to change where the child lives. Grandparents can seek a continuing relationship without seeking to replace the parents as the child’s main carers.
This is different from special guardianship, which concerns a longer-term arrangement for caring for a child and carries parental responsibility.
Where your aim is to restart visits or communication, advice should focus on contact and the relevant child arrangements, rather than assuming that a guardianship application is needed.
Grandparents usually need permission, sometimes called leave, to apply for a child arrangements order. This is a separate question from whether contact should ultimately be ordered.
There are statutory exceptions. Depending on the circumstances, these may involve an existing legal status or order, qualifying previous living arrangements or the required consents. A solicitor should check whether an exception applies to the particular application you want to make.e.g. a person with whom the child has lived for at least three years (not necessarily continuous, beginning no more than five years and ending no more than three months before the application) can apply without permission.
Regular babysitting should not be confused with the child having lived with you for a qualifying period.
The C100 application allows an applicant to request permission where needed, so the permission request can be included alongside the proposed child arrangements application.
Obtaining permission does not guarantee contact. It means the application can proceed for the court to consider the arrangements.
Under section 10 of the Children Act 1989, relevant considerations include:
The nature of the proposed application.
Your connection with the child.
Whether the application risks disrupting the child’s life to such an extent that they would be harmed.
Explain your relationship clearly. Relevant background might include how frequently you saw the child, the care you provided and how long you have been out of contact.
Avoid presenting the application simply as a demand for equal treatment between grandparents or compensation for past help. Explain the relationship from the child’s perspective and the arrangements you are asking the court to consider.
If permission is granted, the court must then decide whether making a contact order would serve the child’s welfare. Evidence about the child’s needs, the existing relationship and any safeguarding concerns will be central to that decision.
If your application proceeds, the child’s welfare is the court’s paramount consideration under section 1 of the Children Act 1989.
The court considers the section 1(3) welfare checklist when determining a disputed child arrangements application. This includes the child’s wishes and feelings, assessed in light of their age and understanding, their physical, emotional and educational needs, and the likely effect of changes in their circumstances.
The assessment also considers the child’s background, any harm they have suffered or may face, the ability of relevant adults to meet their needs and the court’s available powers.
For a grandparent, this means explaining what the proposed contact would offer the child. An established relationship, familiar routines and emotional support may be relevant. So may the reasons contact stopped and whether visits would expose the child to continuing adult conflict.
The court should only make an order if doing so would be better for the child than making no order. A grandparent’s understandable distress is not, on its own, enough to justify contact.
The child’s wishes matter, but they are considered alongside the other welfare factors. A child does not automatically decide the outcome at a particular age.
An older child’s considered views may carry substantial weight. A younger child may express their feelings differently, including through their reactions to family relationships and routines.
Where the court requires an assessment, Cafcass in England or Cafcass Cymru in Wales may help establish the child’s views and advise on welfare. The court makes the decision.
Do not coach your grandchild, do not ask them to write a letter supporting your application, and do not repeatedly question them about the dispute. They should be able to express their feelings without being made responsible for resolving it.
Contact does not have to mean immediately restoring every visit or overnight stay that happened before the relationship broke down.
Depending on the evidence, an arrangement might involve short visits, daytime contact, calls or letters. Where appropriate, contact could build gradually after a lengthy separation.
Supervised contact may be considered where safeguards are needed. In other circumstances, indirect contact may be more appropriate than meeting in person.
There is no standard number of visits that grandparents are entitled to receive. The court can also decide that contact should not take place if that is necessary for the child’s welfare.
A realistic proposal should address the child’s current circumstances rather than simply asking to return to an old routine.
Allegations of abuse, neglect, harmful conflict or unsafe behaviour must be taken seriously. The court may require further information or assessment before deciding what contact, if any, is appropriate.
A concern might also arise if a grandparent proposes allowing contact with another adult whose involvement is restricted. An application for grandparent contact should not be used to bypass restrictions affecting a parent.
Tell your solicitor about existing orders and any involvement by children’s services. Explain the concerns raised, even where you disagree with them.
If you believe a child is at immediate risk of harm, contact the police. Other safeguarding concerns should be raised with the local authority’s children’s services rather than treated solely as a disagreement about visits.
A clear account of the relationship and a workable proposal are more useful than a lengthy record of every family disagreement.
For an initial legal appointment, gather:
A brief timeline of your involvement and when contact stopped.
Relevant messages about previous arrangements and attempts to resolve the disagreement.
Copies of existing court orders and details of any ongoing proceedings.
Your proposed arrangements, including frequency, transport and practical safeguards.
Explain how contact would fit around school, activities and time with the parents. If you previously provided childcare, describe what you actually did and how regularly.
Keep records factual. Avoid gathering information by pressuring the child or accessing private accounts and documents without permission. Your solicitor can advise which evidence is relevant and how it should be presented.
Where an order already provides for your contact, the issue may be enforcement rather than obtaining a new order.
Keep a record of missed contact and the explanation given. Your solicitor should review the wording before advising whether negotiation, an enforcement application or a variation is appropriate.
The court will consider why the arrangements have not happened and whether circumstances have changed. Enforcement is not automatic, and the child’s welfare remains important.
Do not attempt to enforce the order yourself by collecting the child unexpectedly or disregarding other restrictions.
There is no guaranteed timescale for resolving a grandparents’ contact dispute. Agreement may be possible without proceedings, while a contested application can take several months or longer.
Timing depends on permission requirements, safeguarding enquiries, any reports needed and court availability. Starting proceedings does not guarantee immediate interim contact.
Court application fees are separate from solicitors’ fees and mediation costs. Help with Fees (formerly fee remission) may be available depending on your income and capital.
Ask for an explanation of the likely stages, costs and alternatives before committing to proceedings. Early advice can help you identify the appropriate route without assuming that a full contested hearing is inevitable.
Grandparents do not have an automatic right to contact in England and Wales. They can seek an agreement or apply for a child arrangements order, usually with the court’s permission. Any court decision must focus on the child’s welfare rather than the grandparent’s entitlement.
Potentially, yes. Both parents objecting does not automatically prevent an application. However, their reasons will need to be considered, and you will usually require permission to apply. Neither permission nor a previous close relationship guarantees that contact will be ordered.
No. Regular childcare does not automatically give a grandparent parental responsibility. It may be relevant evidence of your relationship with the child. If the child has lived with you or you already hold an order, your legal position should be checked separately.
You will normally need to attend a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting unless an exemption applies. This is different from being required to reach agreement through mediation. If mediation is unsuitable or another person refuses to participate, legal options may still be available.
No. Special guardianship concerns a longer-term caring arrangement and is not normally the appropriate route simply to restart visits. A child arrangements order dealing with contact may be relevant instead. The appropriate application depends on whether you are seeking contact or responsibility for the child’s care.
Losing contact with a grandchild can leave you unsure how to protect the relationship without deepening the family dispute.
Taylor Rose’s child arrangements solicitors can advise on negotiation, applications for child arrangements orders and issues involving existing orders. Your solicitor can review your circumstances, explain whether permission is needed and help you develop a proposal focused on your grandchild’s welfare.
Whether contact has recently stopped or discussions have reached a standstill, contact Taylor Rose to discuss your options and the next steps towards resolving arrangements for your grandchild.
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